Am I weird?

I went for my run today and I felt such satisfaction when I walked in the door and saw how sweaty my shirt was. It is always one of the things I check and get great happiness out of seeing drenched with sweat from my hard workout. I know some people probably get all grossed out and rip off their shirt and go immediately into the shower but I love seeing how much I worked and kicked ass out there.

Am I weird? Am I the only one who does this? I even look at my shirt before going into the shower and I'm just like "Yeah Jennuh. You kicked ass. ;D"

It makes me so happy and proud of myself for going for my run. Today was great, btw. I took a week and a half off mainly because I was visiting my sister in NC and because I had a really bad shin splint in my right leg. But all seems a lot better now. I went out there and tore it up. :D Definitely pounded the pavement today. Might do some cycling at the gym tomorrow and get the new class schedule. I feel really excited to get back into my workout routine and really get onto my weight loss adventure. So going to be thin and healthy soon and happy. ^^

Heat and smog

I had a hard run today. Got very frustrated with my splits on my Garmin so I just ended up turning it off and trying to get some relaxing untimed unpressured run in. I just am not a good summer runner. I would rather run in 20-30 degree weather with snow on the ground like I did in Potsdam. Blerg. Once it starts hitting above 70s I feel like I'm dying. I probably also feel terrible because I'm not running in the country anymore but now I'm running in heat AND smog. Smog is just terrible. It's not even officially summer yet and I feel like death out there. :( Sigh. It's really making a dent on my motivation.

I really really want to do the Brooklyn Bridge 5k in 36 minutes. I don't know if I'm going to get there. But for now.. that is my goal.

Motivation.

Lately, I've been finding it particularly hard to remain motivated. I do enjoy running alone.. but lately a lack of support has put me down. It is very hard being the only person in your family who works out regularly, attempts to eat healthily, and the only one making strides towards living a healthier lifestyle. I don't have a picture of me racing or crossing the finish line.. or an afterwards picture because simply.. I have no support system. I love seeing pictures of other runners crossing the finish line or pictures of them along the route. I would hope to have pictures of myself like that one day. I just don't know if that'll ever happen.

I am a solo-runner. I am part of the North Brooklyn Runners but I haven't gone to a group run in a while (taking off, gaining weight, slowing pace, losing endurance has really made me stop). How do I get motivation otherwise? I suppose I am very self-motivated and disciplined.. but sometimes it would be nice to hear encouragement from others -- especially my family.

I guess I won't let this bother me too much. About to lace up my sneakers and get out.

Garmin turned not-so-friend.

I have noticed over the past year of using my Garmin Forerunner 305 that is off by like 1/10th of mile most of the time even on the clearest days. This has become quite annoying after a while. I would like to trust my Garmin 100% but when I track myself on maps and see that the Garmin was off.. it upsets me. I also see this when I view the route the Garmin thinks I have taken online. It seems like I could fly and cut through the middle of buildings etc. As much as I still love using it for working out the fact that it takes FOREVER to find satellite reception and then isn't even accurate is very annoying. It takes my Garmin about 5-10 minutes to get satellites and even when I updated my maps and firmware.. it made so difference. I think I will eventually have to invest in a better watch once I get a job. I did get my Garmin 305 for free from my Dad so I can't really complain.

I just wish it made me feel better about my progress rather than me having to get home to really find out how well I did.

Here I am! :)

I'm back! I graduated from college with my Bachelor's degree. I'm now certified to teach elementary school Pre-K through 6th grade. :) I'm home now and taking a break from school. I got accepted into my master's program but I decided to defer and take a year off and focus on myself and weightloss. Also, I needed to find out who I am when I'm not in school. With schoolwork I become such a workaholic that I can't imagine what I'm like without it. I've never been out of school before.. so this will definitely be interesting. I also want to finally get to losing all of this weight and being finally happy in my own body. :)

Been on a few runs since getting home. I did a lot of relaxing. I still have yet to unpack. It feels great to be reunited with my family even though we are having some hards times with my grandma right now. It makes me really glad that I'm taking a break from school to be here to support my family.. mainly my Mom.

I have 1 race lined up so far. I will be running the Brooklyn Bridge 5k again this year. Time to get to training so I can try to beat my time from last year! :) Planning to run the Williamsburg bridge in the coming weeks and get used to the bridge runs which are definitely long and have steep climbs. :P

Ran for 3 miles today even after recovering from being sick all weekend! I'm so proud of myself. I don't think I've run 3 miles since November/December that wasn't race related. :) Yeeey.

I really need to get some motivation! I ran today and when I went to log my workout I can't believe that 20 days had passed since my last run! 20 DAYS. I swear.. time is just FLYING by me. :( I really need to make myself for accountable and get myself out there. I'm really planning to lose at least 40lbs over the summer and I want to get started on my goal now.

I felt really unmotivated during my run. I just felt sad and depressed. I just couldn't get my legs moving. I had just come home from a stressful day with my 1st graders as well and my feet were killing meee. I just couldn't stop thinking so much while I was out there. The entire time..

"I'm so tired."
"My feet hurt."
"What am I going to do for classroom management.."
"I can't believe I couldn't keep running."
"I don't want to walk, I want to run like I used to."
"It's cold."
"People are watching me."
"I'm depressed."
"I miss home."

It was just constant complaining in my mind. Which is very unusual for me since when I run I usually just forget about everything and the only thing I usually think about is my feet hitting the floor. For some reason the sound of that and watching it just relaxes me. Didn't work today.

I did get a boost of motivation tho! I was about halfway through my route when a group of girls running were about the zoom by me. They kindly said thank you and continued on their way. I just felt motivated watching them that I was able to get started again and take a lot fewer breaks for the rest of my run. I just kept thinking about how great it will feel when I will be able to go father and faster and how easier it'll be when I lose more weight.

So yes. I want to keep myself accountable.